Project #3: I want to Host a Collective 30th Birthday (3/4 interested crew)
FEB 2023 UPDATE: It’s happening
As previously mentioned, I’m outlining ideas that I’d like to pursue if I can gather the proper collaborators— let me know if you or someone you know might be interested! Here’s project #3.
Project 3: Collective 30th Birthday
I’m looking for a group of individuals (3 or 4 + me) to plan a collective 30th birthday event together.
My 30th birthday will be in March 2023, and I’d love to use the milestone as an opportunity to reflect and direction set. I’d love to do so co creating with motivated collaborators, in the thoughtful company of beloved friends. Though to be clear, “my birthday” is not the point of this project; if anything, I’m interested in making my birthday less about “my birthday”.
Here’s the idea: age 30 seems like a major milestone for a lot of people. These days, it seems like most people regard their 30th birthday with an “oh no” vibe. I’d love to unpack that together and make space for what contributes to that vibe, whether it’s regret, shame, disappointment, disillusionment, frustration, whatever. And I’d love to create space to explore what an upcoming decade with a different vibe would look like and need. I think these are important questions that most of us don’t make time to ask/answer, including the majority of people over 30. I like the idea of this event also being a “make up 30th birthday” for people, “the 30th birthday you needed but didn’t get”. See here for a bunch of potential questions we might tackle at such an event.
Logistics, like when/where/how long/what/how, I think would all depend on the organizing crews wishes, crossed with the preferences of attendees.
You might be a good collaborator for this journey if the following describes you:
- Experience bringing people together
- Resonance with the emotional weight of turning 30 (or X age)
- Desire to collaborate
- Emotional competence (awareness, communication, etc.)
EDIT: After chatting with my friend Pierce (first co-collaborator!), I realized that collaborating in the teal, self managing way method is actually a “requirement” for me, personally. I have plenty of experience planning events as the “lead”, and I’d prefer to share the burden of the pressures, backstopping, and responsibilities. Furthermore, in my experience, being “in power” actually reduces my sense of belonging, and I want to belong at an event I’m organizing. Conversely, I’m really interested in experimenting with self organization, and seeing how we come together (or don’t) as a crew. So having said that, here are some expectations that I’d want collaborators to be on the same page on:
- I’m hopeful that each collaborator will do roughly 1/N of the work, myself included (where N=# of crew members)
- I’d like all collaborators to be fully bought into whatever it is that we’re doing. I think it probably entails, among other things, being involved from visioning from the start.
- Expect to invite your friends/people in your network. I don’t think this could be pulled off with only friends of mine. Your friends (or some subset of them) are the intended audience of this event.
- Self responsibility — if balls are getting dropped, say something. If something needs doing and you have capacity, do it (with an eye on the advice process). If you’re having beef with me or another collaborator, have a nonviolent but courageous conversation.
One worry/hang up I have is uncertainty around how many of my existing close friends would be interested in such an event. I had previously decided that I wanted to spend my birthday with a smaller number of my closest friends, which is a departure from my historical “more the merrier” approach. My current plan is to separately plan something more accessible/amiable with them.
I have a sneaking suspicion that this could go really well and become a viable business — planning “collective 30th birthdays” around the world, doing the same for 40th, 50th, etc. birthdays. I don’t really have any interest in scaling up that business but if any collaborator(s) wanted to, I’d be happy to encourage and support them in doing so.
Having said all of this, if you or anyone you know are interested in collaborating on a collective 30th birthday event, please reach out!!!
Other Projects
Project #1 — Move to a city with a crew
Project #2 — Lord of the Rings Themed Trip
